She was the prettiest girl in school and the most popular. Press had had a crush on her since sixth grade and now that he was a senior it was time to talk to her.
"This is it, I'm going to ask her out today." Press said to his best friend Emma as they walked to school.
"Do you really think that is a good idea? She hasn't acknowledged you in six years." Emma tried to talk me out of my plan.
Before first period I saw her, she looked so beautiful in her cheer uniform. "Um, excuse me, Hannah?" I stumbled over my words, "Would you want to go out with me sometime?"
"You're asking me out? You? What was your name again?" Hannah asked.
"Umm, it's um, Press, we have been going to school together since sixth grade." I replied.
"Oh, right, you're that guy who is always hanging around that bookworm girl. What was her name again?"
"Emma? She's just a friend." I said.
"Hmm right, I'm pretty sure she likes you, but if you really want to go out with me, I need some things from you." Hannah stated. "First, I really hate french, and I have a paper due tomorrow. Write it for me."
"Yes, okay, anything. I'll bring it to you before first period tomorrow." I told her.
Later that afternoon I was having lunch with Emma as usual and writing Hannah's French paper.
"You know if she really liked you, she wouldn't make you write her paper. She would have just said yes." Emma told me.
"She just really hates French, it's okay. I'll write it and then she will say yes" I told her.
......
I met Hannah before first period the next day and gave her the paper. "So, does this mean we can go out?" I asked.
"Well, I have to babysit my little brother tomorrow night and I really want to go to Ty's party. Maybe you could do that for me so I could go out?" Hannah blinked her big green eyes at me.
"Oh sure, I can watch your little brother." I told her.
"Thank you! It really means a lot to me. Ty is the most popular guy in school and how would it look if I weren't at his party?"
......
"I can't believe you are going to this!" Emma screamed at me on our walk home from school, "Can't you see she is just using you? There are plenty of girls who would love to go out with you just because you're you?"
"It's okay, Emma, she needs to be at that party. It would look really bad if she weren't there." I tried to appease her.
"Fine, but when you're done doing her chores and realize she doesn't really like you, I may just not be here to pick up the pieces." Emma called as she turned to go home.
"She doesn't know what she is talking about." I thought to myself.
......
The weekend was finally over and I just knew Hannah was going to say yes today. Watching her brother had been awful. He was a pretty terrible little kid, but I had done it and she couldn't say no now.
"Hey Hannah, how's it going?" I approached her. "Would you like to go to the football game with me this Friday?"
"Oh shoot, I would but I promised my Dad I would wash my car. Maybe if someone washed it for me I would be free this Friday." Hannah pouted at me.
"I could wash it tonight. Emma and I were supposed to go to a book reading, but I can reschedule." I beamed at her.
"Oh would you? Thank you!" Hannah smiled.
At lunch I told Emma I would have to reschedule going to the book reading with her.
"I can't believe you," Emma scowled at me, "She is using you. She isn't going to go out with you."
"You don't know that Ems." I tried to calm her down.
"I do know that and I'm not going to watch another second. Don't come crying to me when she still won't go out with you." Emma ran off.
......
I was exhausted as I approached Hannah the next morning. I had spent hours cleaning her car and making sure everything was perfect and then I had to stay up all night to complete my own homework.
"Hey Hannah, so we on for Friday?" I asked her.
"Oh Press, I'm sorry, Ty asked me out for Friday this morning. You understand, right? He's the most popular guy in school." Hannah smiled at me, "Maybe we can go out next week. In fact, I have another French paper due next Tuesday, maybe you could come over and write it for me? We could hangout then."
"Yeah, no, I can't believe I thought you actually liked me. You're just using me." I said. I turned to go find Ems. I owed her a huge apology.
"Ems, hey Ems", I yelled when I saw her across the hall.
She looked up at me, smirked, and turned to Zach and smiled up at him. Then I noticed they were holding hands.
What had I done? Emma had warned me she wouldn't be here when I figured out that Hannah was using me and I didn't believe her. Now she was gone. I didn't even know she liked Zach, I thought she just liked me. How could I have been so stupid?
Author's Note:
This story was inspired by the Trials of Yamato in Japanese Mythology, story source:Romance of Old Japan, Part I: Mythology and Legend by E. W. Champney and F. Champney (1917). In the story Yamato is married to a beautiful princess, but he is fickle and leaves her to find a siren. The siren then puts him through a series of trials before he can be with her. Once he completes them all his lovely wife is dead and he can no longer be with her. I opted to put this story in a more modern setting and have Press lose his best friend instead of the wife dying.
I thought you did a great job of giving this story a modern twist, but still staying true to the plot! I feel like the Hannah/Press/Emma situation is so common in TV shows and romcoms, it was really easy to relate to! I also like that you toned down the ending a bit. I think that, for a high schooler, losing a best friend is probably nearly as painful as losing a spouse! This was so fun to read. I'm looking forward to seeing more of your stories!
ReplyDeleteHi Luisa, I was not familiar with the story of the Trials of Yamato from Japanese Mythology, so luckily your Author’s Note gave me enough information so that I could see the major differences between your version of the story and the original one. I really liked how you decided to make your version of the story more modern because it made it very interesting for me to read. Overall, great job!
ReplyDeleteI love that you took a classic fairy tale and place it in a modern setting. The dialogue between the characters made the story very real. As I was reading I thought this sounds like something that would be in an after school special on the Lifetime channel. I always love watching episodes like this. The only thing that I didn't like was the the Press and Emm didn't get together in the end. I am a sucker for a happy ending. The part I did like about the ending though was that it taught a moral lesson. Unfortunately people ofte don't realize what they have until it is gone. I look forward to reading more of your writing.
ReplyDeleteHey Luisa, your story was incredibly easy to relate to. It reminded me of "How I Met Your Mother" when they cover the topic of always keeping someone on your hook and wanting someone else. I feel many of us are guilty of chasing things or people we don't really need when everything we need is right under our noses. Great story!
ReplyDeleteHey Luisa, your story was incredibly easy to relate to. It reminded me of "How I Met Your Mother" when they cover the topic of always keeping someone on your hook and wanting someone else. I feel many of us are guilty of chasing things or people we don't really need when everything we need is right under our noses. Great story!
ReplyDeleteI really liked your opening story. I love the feeling of innocence that I got from the opening scene and the following sentence- such a classic set up for a story!
ReplyDeleteMy family calls me Ems so I really loved this touch in the story. The conclusion to this story is so classic- but leaves me asking questions. What is Press going to do now? Will this compromise their friendship? Will Ty and Hannah work out?
Great job!
Emily
This was adapted really well. It reads like an episode of a pre-teen sitcom except in the sitcom the two friends would probably make up at the end. But it translated the whole moral of the original story which was not to take for granted what you have in pursuit of something that seems better but is really just a siren chase. You kept it very focused and easy to understand.
ReplyDelete